Match report - DUNDEE 4 PARTICK THISTLE 0
DUNDEE 4 PARTICK THISTLE 0
Match Report-Saturday 9th May 2009
by Partick the Dog (with assistance from Wee Honk)
Dundee University produced the students who formed Snow Patrol. Rain Patrol or even Wet Wet Wet would have been more fitting as the last game of Thistle’s season was played out to the backdrop of the greatest monsoon to hit the British Isles since the first friendly of Thistle’s season in Blyth. In conditions so extreme you would not even take your pet fish out for a walk, Thistle were drowned by a lucky strike and three clinical finishes. Yet if fortune and clinicality (???) had been on Thistle’s side this could have been a high-scoring draw and the defiant chants of “We’re going to win 5-4” which rang out from the away stand at Dens Park with ten minutes to go were not as irrational as the final scoreline might suggest.
The Tayside Constabulary and their steward sidekicks had returned from their training week at Guantanamo Bay in time to take up their accustomed positions guarding the one set of turnstiles against alien insurgency. Given the prevailing conditions, your reporter was concerned that waterboarding might be on the agenda, but fortunately the body cavities search and subsequent interrogation was restricted to the suspicious sheets of notepaper in the rucksack.
Hats off to a colourful collection of Jags supporters who had clearly taken advice from Andy Millen(er) at last week’s charity match and came adorned in a kaleidoscopic cornucopia of headgear, including one sporting a road cone. How they got through the security cordon to enter the stadium I am not quite sure, but their presence was grudged from start to finish. As the world economy spirals into freefall and swine flu grips the planet, you might think that the authorities had more important things to attend to than enforcing the law against standing up and enjoying yourself in a public place in Dundee, especially when such activities are not threatening or inconveniencing anyone else or damaging any property. However, rules are rules and there are two sides to every story etc etc.
In a pleasant contrast to many meaningless end of season league games, both teams set out to attack and to entertain the paying (and non-paying junior) customers. As Thistle played a makeshift line-up using every senior player left standing, I will not attempt any serious analysis of the Thistle formation and tactics, which to put it kindly were fluid (as befitting the overhead conditions) and flexible (Maxwell, Paton and Storey in particular shuffled into different positions several times).
Before I could work out whether we were playing 4-4-2 or 5-3-2 Schimon Schtorey had (to quote Gus Hiddink) schloppily conceded a corner. The ball was half-cleared to the D (or should that be Dee?) where Darren Young struck it firmly goalwards. It would have been a straightforward save for Jonny Tuffey, but a wicked deflection gave him no chance.
Dundee had most of the early pressure and after Deasley and McMenamin had combined, a dangerous cross traversed the Thistle goalmouth with no one to apply a finish. Thistle slowly hauled themselves back into contention and there were some attractive bursts of possession play, with Liam Buchanan and Paul Paton showing up well.
My notes are littered with comments such as
“cross blocked”
“crowded out”
“did not fall to a Thistle player”
“dragged his shot wide”
which probably sum up the action sufficiently without need to detail each individual instance.
Much of the action was taking place off the field of play. Kevin McKinlay and the other substitutes received a warm round of applause. The Mad Hatters then endeavoured to encourage all and sundry to wave to them. They succeeded with Ian McCall, Gerry Britton, John Henry and Craig Hinchcliffe, but failed with Willie Kinniburgh, Jocky Scott and the referee. Songs then rang out in tribute to Dens Park legends such as Juan Sara. Fabrizzio Ravanelli, Fan Zhyi, Simon Stainrod and Ivano Fanio Bonetti.
Apart from an Andrew Shinnie shot which Jonny did well to save low at his near post, Dundee offered little in attack until Colin McMenamin took a hand. His surname may be unpronounceable (try saying “McMenamin McManaman” ten times quickly), but the quality of his finishing is beyond question. The Thistle defence parted like the Red (and Yellow) Sea and a straightforward ball poked right through the middle gave M&Ns a clear run through on Tuffey. Jonny did all he could to push the Dundee striker wide, in the hope that others could get back to cover the line, but all to no avail. The final shot was crisp and decisive.
This goal had been against the run of play, but Dundee then tried to ram home their advantage. Archie had to clear from another dangerous Deasley cross, and Malone shot over the bar from a good position. Yet the half ended with Thistle again on the attack and Twaddle missed the best chance yet when his header from a superb Paton cross slipped narrowly by. From my vantage point this appeared to be a bad miss from close in, but a whole pitch length away it is difficult to be sure and it may have been harder than it looked.
The Dens Park DJ tried to make Simon Storey feel more at home at halftime by playing Rolf Harris’ “Jake the Peg”. At least we were spared “Two little Boys”. He then moved on to “The Wild Rover”. It took the fans a little time to realise that this is the tune for “I’ve followed Partick Thistle for many a day”, and by the time that they had cottoned on, the song was almost over.
Hinchy and Jonny were out for their usual half-time warm up. Rab Douglas took up his accustomed position in the Dundee goal, and happily responded to the Jags fans’ request for a wave, but churlishly refused to swing on the bar!
Inspired by Morag Pirie’s presence as an assistant referee, Thistle (with Kevin McKinlay replacing Ian Maxwell) began the second half with all the ferocity of Joanna Lumley fighting the cause of the Gurkhas. Siege was laid to the Dundee goal. Twaddle went close with his head and then, from a Paton freekick, Harkins could not direct his unchallenged header goalwards.
Thistle had more corners than an old threepenny piece but, apart from a few goalmouth stramashes, no concrete scoring opportunities emerged. The surprise secret weapon in the Thistle locker was Alan Archibald. Perhaps knowing that when Archie scores once, he always scores twice, Ian McCall gave him licence to cross the halfway line and his determination was driving the team forward. Hopefully this is a development which will be followed up next season as this type of inspiring performance from the captain could make a major contribution to a promotion push. Twice Archie latched on to the ball and drove into the box to unleash firm and well-directed low shots. Twice Rab Douglas got down well to beat the ball away at his near post.
A wonderful curling John Robertson cross unlocked the offside trap to leave three Thistle players running on to the ball with only Douglas to beat. Harkins was first to the ball but again could not keep the header down. McKinlay also headed over before Kris Doolan replaced a tiring and limping Liam Buchanan.
From nowhere, McMenamin flicked a near post cross past Tuffey, and, instead of the Archbishop Desmond 2-2 score which would have reflected the balance of the play it was 0-3…..and Rab Douglas swung on the bar! Fair play to him, and the Thistle fans appreciated the banter.
Ricky (Delap) Little came on for Paul Paton (who was one booking short of a suspension) to put in some long throws. Donnelly, Storey and Harkins all picked up bookings for minor fouls. Then, from the edge of the box, McMenamin calmly passd the ball into the net to complete his hat-trick and to augment a Thistle-bashing record which is beginning to put him on a par with such as Brian MacPhee and (whisper his name) Owen Coyle.
Glorious Gary Harkins, while not being fully on song, had managed some trademark mazy runs, most of which were snuffed out by telling challenges outside the box. However, he almost had the last laugh with a powerful shot that was heading for the top corner before the fingertips of Douglas intervened.
The final ten minutes passed by without serious incident as the Mad Hatters posed for photographs with their policeman pals. Someone told me that one of the stewards may have smiled.
Gary Harkins had one last run, David Rowson had one last overhead kick and Simon Donnelly had one last throughball which no one else read, and that was it.
The players applauded the fans. Willie Kinniburgh gave his boots to one young supporter. Harkins and Tuffey spent the longest time clapping the support and were the last to leave. Gary picked up a scarf thrown by one of the fans. Jonny’s gloves and shirt found their way into the crowd. Everyone tried to interpret the implications of these gestures. Will they stay or will they go? Watch this space……
Dundee’s favourite poet William McGonagall might have put it like this:
The Jags lost 4-0 to Bonnie Dundee
Managed by Jocky Scott, the OAP.
As disasters go, this result was hardly of Tay Bridge proportions. It is to be hoped that we have saved up some good luck and great goals to unleash on Dundee in the more serious challenges to follow next season.
“MP” stands for Matchreporting Partickthedog. So all that remains is for me to wish all readers a happy and relaxed close season……and to file my expenses claim!
Teams:-
Thistle (ratings): Tuffey 6, Storey 6, Twaddle 6, Maxwell 6 (McKinlay 7), Robertson 6, Archibald 8, Paton 7 (Little 7), Rowson 7, Buchanan 7 (Doolan 6), Donnelly 6, Harkins 6
Unused Subs: Hinchcliffe, Kinniburgh
Dundee: Douglas (Roy), Cowan, Malone, Benedictus, MacKenzie, Lauchlan, Shinnie (Daquin), Posniak, McMenamin, Deasley, Young
Unused Subs: Williams, Gilhaney, Grant
Referee: Stevie O’Reilly
Assistants: Mark Douglas & Morag Pirie
Goals:
Dundee: Young 1, McMenamin 34, 69, 74
Attendance: 2831